Riverdo's and Riverdon'ts

Season 3: Episode 10: Tony Soprano's Gently Clapping Ass Cheeks Present: Rumplejailskin the Incarceration Goblin

This episode is wretched and deeply frustrating, but don't you worry-- the cast of Riverdo's and Riverdon'ts is ready to kick it into an entirely different gear to force entertainment into this non-entertainment-shaped aperture.

Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)

Season 3: Episode 9: "I'm Horny, Reggie (Reggie, I'm Horny)"

Buckle up, folks, this is easily one of the worst episodes yet.

Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)

Season 3: Episode 8: Lüg Nüt

The misery continues as everyone is dumb and nearly all action is unmotivated. However, there are some good things here, like the shark-jumping potential getting supercharged, and some gnarly new stupid names.

Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)

Season 3: Episode 7: Ripped to Shit on Fizzle Rocks (feat. The Hamshoes Revue)

In our experience, there are 2 kinds of shitty Riverdale episodes. One is the kind that's boring and painful to get through. The other is shitty in a way that generates utter chaos in the ensuing conversation and analysis.

This Riverdale episode is the second kind of shitty Riverdale episode.

Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)

Season 3: Episode 6: Hiram Tiddie Shirt

So, probably the weirdest thing about this episode is how the writers, with a shocking degree of consistency, set up a scene, escalate it,

Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)

Season 3: Episode 5: The Mad Emperor Be Shiddin'

You'd think that a 90's homage mixed with a bizarre take on the Satanic Panic of the 80's mixed with what seems like a preoccupation with the good Nightmare on Elm Street movie would be weirder than the episode after it, which takes us back to the main timeline.

You'd be dead mcfucking wrong.

Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)

Season 3: Episode 4: Chekhov's Nunchucks

What happens when the 80's, the 90's, and Riverdale all have a bunch of nasty, unprotected sex? This episode is what.

Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)

Season 3: Episode 3: The Devil's Himbo

RDARD emerges from its eternal slumber to dissect a surprisingly shitty episode, full of cursed horny energy.

Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)

Season 3: Episode 2: Five-Score Boys Hump a Fence

Never fear, RDARD listeners. The lukewarm sluggishness of the previous episode is gone in a whirl of road dust as Season Three's second episode does a sick burnout and just throws EVERYTHING at EVERYONE.

Thrill! As we discover how Archie is similar to a doughnut.

Be Mesmerized! As two increasingly absurd plot lines threaten to collide catastrophically with one another.

And... Listen! To our cool podcast, thank you so much.

Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)

Season 3: Episode 1: What is a Hot Dog but a Meat Serpent?

After what feels like an eternal incarceration in the Ostowverse, we're back to the TV show!

Quinn and Rob are joined by Arlie to unfold what promises (at least early on) to be the wildest and most baffling season of Riverdale yet.

Thrill as we witness the absolute burial of Riverdale: Get Out of Town's canonicity and join us in our struggle to pull any meaning from this shockingly disposable season opener.

Music:
Josh Woodward - Faded War (Instrumental)